It is almost 6 weeks since we welcomed our twin boys into the family. Things have been crazy at times and peaceful as well. What things have a learned so far about being a mother to four children as well as twins. Well let me see… organization is key first of all. Get a good calendar and try to keep your life as routine as possible. We have been trying to keep things easy-going, we try to keep family outings to one a day if we all have to leave or at least one a day for the twins. I find that the more we try to pack in a day the harder it is on all the kids. The girls can get out of sorts just as quickly as the boys. David and I are learning to divide and conquer as well. Running errands is much easier for one person than for six. We did enjoy doing many of them together as a family before but now it just isn’t as easy with so many people to try to keep happy.
We have also applied that method as well to visitors. Too many people in and out of the house in a day to play or visit with the boys can be too much as well. With visitors as well we try to keep it only to one part of the day, morning or afternoon. The boys can quickly get overstimulated and then that can make the rest of our day hard for us. We have been doing so great since our family doubled in size. My husband and I have even said to each other that it isn’t as hard as we thought and much of that has to do with how we organize our days. We have not become hermits we simply make sure that we respect everyone’s needs in the house. Our boys are still so very small and like the comforts of home and routine.
We have also make sure to make special time for each person. Having newborn twins can easily take up a lot of time, but we work at everyone taking turns in the house. Sometimes the girls need to wait for the boys to eat before I can cook them a meal or help them do something and sometimes the boys need to wait and even cry a little before I can tend to them. Most of the time I make sure to feed and change the boys before I know the girls are going to need me, that lets me spend more time with them instead of running back and forth around the house. It also has taught the boys to sleep on their own and the fact that they find comfort in each other helps as well. The girls get some special time with me each day, sometimes it is a lot sometimes it is only a little depending on what is going on but none the less I make sure they get some every day.
Special time also works for my husband and I. We have been working at making sure to spend with each other at night when everyone has gone to bed. Now that the boys have a bedtime routine it has made it much easier. Since going out right now isn’t easy we find things at home to do. Watch a TV show together we both enjoy, talk, play our Wii together or board games. It helps us stay connected now that our family has grown and we don’t have the time we used to for each other.
One of the other things we have worked out since the boys were born is things we need and want the other spouse to do. David takes care of laundry during night shifts so we can catch up and helps out other times we need it done. He is also given down time as well since 12 hour shifts are long, but only when things are quiet enough that I can handle. If the house is in a meltdown David has to wait for his me time. I’m given the same chance as well and for me that is mostly the chance to run errands out of the house by myself. We also work together during the down time to make sure the important chores are being done and if either of us needs a nap they are given that time.
It still feels like we live in a zoo most days but at least it is an organized zoo for us. We have been very lucky and hope that by keeping things organized and going with the flow of our families needs we can continue to feel lucky that we all very happy and doing very well.
From our Happy Family to Yours!